The Truth Hurts
by livinginlimbo
Summary: Edward is a successful matchmaker who has not met a match of his own. To spread the ideals of true love, he creates a reality tv show called The Truth Hurts. Can these girls swallow the realities he feeds to them? Idea is based on the show Tough Love
1. My Name Is Edward

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight franchise, this all belongs to Meyer

**I decided to go back to basics and clean up the chapters one by one… bare with me!**

Chapter One

"My name is Edward Cullen, and I want to be your own personal Cupid. I can help you find love. In this day and age, dating has been made more difficult with technology and billions of self-help books. Banish them all from your lives ladies. I know single women, and can tell what kind of signals they are sending out based on what they are wearing, how they pose, and their actions around each other. Every one of these women is capable of finding love, but can they handle the truth? Find out on Wednesday, May 3 at 10pm".

"And cut! Perfect Edward, absolutely perfect! This show is going to get ratings! You'll be famous!"

The young man smiled and nodded. He had long since given up in trying to correct the producers about his real motive behind the show. While they seemed interested in boosted ratings and more cash in their wallets, he merely wanted to show any girl that she was capable of true love, no matter how impossible her situation seemed. Edward was in the business of love, and there was nothing he wanted to do more than help people find each other. His thoughts were interrupted by a light touch on his shoulder.

"Sweetheart, that was perfect, I really think you will do a good job in finding these women love."

"Really Mom? I am kind of worried that they will go overboard with this," he said as he gestured to the heavily lighted setting.

"Don't even worry about it Edward, honestly, we have a very in depth contract with these people. That's what lawyers are for. You call the shots."

"Thanks mom, I needed that, and you're still willing to help me at some points right?"

"Of course, that's what I'm here for! Now let's go get some lunch."

As Edward walked off the set with his mother, he could only think about the potential young women that were going to soon be entering into his alternate reality. _The Truth Hurts, so appropriate, I hope they will be able to handle this, because they are in for a rude awakening._ He thought.


	2. Choosing the Women

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight at all**

**Chapter Two**

"How about this one?"

"No, this one!"

"Come on man, this one!"

Edward shook his head and sighed. He had decided he was going to handpick the girls himself, and had decided to enlist the help of his friends. It was his belief that in order to get more well rounded girls, he was going to need a variety of men to help pick out the women who were considered by their standards, undateable. In theory, this was supposed to be a relatively quick and painless process. So far, it wasn't working.

"Guys, you are missing the entire point, I need girls who exhibit classic deal breaker signs, not potential girlfriends for you. The point is to choose the ones who are wonderful on paper, but men wouldn't touch them with a 10-foot pole. Remember? The point of my show is to pinpoint those reasons and correct them! Look, if this is too hard, then I will just find someone else who can help me."

"Come on man," one of the guys complained, "you know we haven't gotten any in months, we were just having a good time."

The other guys soon joined in immediatetly with their weak attempts at defending themselves. As the noise level was rising, so was Edward's temper. There was a lot at stake with this show, and any issues could very well ruin the career he loved so much.

"Enough! I have heard quite enough! Emmet, honestly, I don't care if you haven't gotten any, it's your fault that you are too picky. I swear, I should have just put you guys on the show instead of finding girls, you whine more than they do. If you guys want to keep helping me, then do your jobs, because in case you have forgotten, I have a lot resting on this show."

"Don't worry Edward, calm down" soothed Jasper, "We were just fooling around, we know how much you have worked for this project, and we won't let you fall flat on your face."

The other guys started to nod their heads.

"Yeah Eddie boy, no harm done, we really want you to do well, you're our buddy after all!"

"Thanks Jasper, it's nice to feel some support every now and again."

"No problem man, plus, if you fail, how are you going to hook us up with any chicks from now on?"

Jasper's comment was met with a pillow hurled at his face, with laughter following.

"What, Jasper gets a thanks, but I don't? My feelings are hurt!"

"Shut up Emmet, when you finally start calling me Edward, then I will acknowledge you."

"Nice try, but not going to happen, Eddie Boy!"

**_**WHOMP**_**

A second pillow was thrown and hit Emmet square in the face. Before a pillow fight could start, Edward redirected his friends back to the task at hand.

"Alright guys, you know what to do, read the profiles and pick the ones that you think are attractive, but have strange little personality things about them. Remember 10-foot pole!"

He felt a lot more relaxed knowing his friends were there with him throughout this whole ordeal.

"What about this one, this girl is HOT, but she has an issue with leaving potential guys way too many texts."

"Sounds like a potential Jazz, how many are we talking exactly,"

"40 within three hours after the first date."

"Throw her on. That's a good start, now find me seven more like that."

It took the guys another two days to get through all of the applicants, but Edward was confident with the ones that he and his friends had chosen. They all had certain quirks that drove guys away at first glance. All they had to do was contact them, and the show would begin.

**Ok, so this concludes chapter two, tell me what you think and what you would like to see. I appreciate feedback.**

**The *new* Count**

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	3. Mother Knows Best

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any part of the Twilight franchise**

**Chapter Three**

A voice broke through the silence at the table, piercing the white noise surrounding the pair eating outside of a restaurant.

"Mom, I don't think I can do this,"

"Why not honey?"

"Because, when I think about what is hanging on the line, I realized that I basically just gambled my whole life away. One wrong move showed to America, and my career could be over. Just like that. I would never be able to work in the industry again. Oh my God. If your name is attached to this too, your company could go under. What have I done?"

Esme sighed and took her son's hand in hers. The past few months had been hectic. Edward's career had skyrocketed, and by word of mouth, his reputation was growing. Interested in what he had to offer, the tv station Crianna had approached him to do the show. It had been a big offer, but determined to spread his advice Edward had accepted the challenge. Now that the taping was coming closer and closer, his nerves were starting to hit him, making everyone else around him riddled with paranoia. This was the final lunch they would have as mother and son before the cameras entered their lives and invaded it completely. Esme blinked quickly remembering that Edward was waiting for a pearl of wisdom to flow from her mouth. It was hard to figure out the right thing to tell her son, but Esme decided to do the best she could. Afterall, she was his mother.

"Don't worry sweetheart, this is nothing new to you. You have been matching up couples off screen. The only difference is that people will be getting an inside look at what you do. Oh, and you will be working on a slightly larger scale, but I have faith in you. I am sure it will all pay off in the end. There will be at least 10 girls out there who will have a new outlook on love, and that is what you wanted in the first place, correct?"

Edward's gaze fell upon his plate, and he nodded his head silently in agreement. Another calming effect attached to her comforting and all knowing perspective. How could he have been so lucky to have a mother like Esme? Had he already forgotten his goal only a few months into his project? He wanted so badly to show people what true love looked like, but the aspect of business and industry had swept him away in the hype. A new sense of determination washed over him. This show would not own him.

"Thanks mom,"

"Anytime dear, now show me, who are the girls that you have so far?"

Edward's shoulders visibly relaxed, and a new glint of excitement was apparent in his eyes. After hours of slaving over thousands of names, he had found the perfect mix of girls that exhibited all of the things that guys usually found obnoxious. He reached down to his bag and pulled out a bundle of folders. Each one was a separate color, with a nickname written in thick marker across the front. He spread them out like a deck of cards in front of his mother, who just smiled and said,

"Let's get started shall we?"

**Alright, so this is the end of chapter three, what do we think so far? Next Chapter, we will be exploring the girls' profiles.**


	4. The Candidates

**Chapter Four**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any part of the Twilight franchise**

**AN: This is the Profiling for the girls about to come on the show check out my other story, it's Bella's piece to the puzzle. Hopefully you will read them in conjunction.**

**Mary Alice "Bridezilla Spazz"**

**Name:** Mary Alice "Alice"

**Age:** 23

**Height:** 4' 10"

**Weight:** 110 Pounds

**Hair Color: **Black

**Eye Color:** Brown

**Reason For Being On The Show:** I can't seem to get guys to stick around for long enough, I guess that they just can't keep up with me. I mean come on, how hard is it to go shopping for nine hours? At least they don't have to do it in heels, I am at high risk of getting blisters every time! Another thing that seems to chase them off, is that I want to get married while I am still young. Nobody seems to want to so that anymore! Am I asking for too much? I think that Edward will be able to help me get out of my little problem and introduce me to new guys who take me seriously.

**Hobbies: **shopping, eating, hanging out with friends, listening to music, texting, talking on the phone, planning parties

**Interesting Facts: **um, that's a good question. My wedding dress has been planned out for the past two years. I have large binder filled with wedding stuff that I have been filling for the past 10 years. I can text 30 words per minute. Ohh my best feature, I have over 500 pairs of shoes!

**Rose "Ball Buster"**

**Name:** Rosalie

**Age:** 29

**Height:** 5' 11"

**Weight:** 150 Pounds

**Hair Color: **Blonde

**Eye Color:** Blue

**Reason For Being On The Show:** Men these days are showing themselves to be extremely girly. I just can't seem to find one that can handle me. Their stamina is extremely poor, and most of them are too damn sensitive.

**Hobbies: **modeling, fixing up cars, shopping, working out, ballet

**Interesting Facts: **I restore cars and then sell them online

**Angela "Wallflower"**

**Name:** Angela

**Age:** 24

**Height:** 5'7"

**Weight:** 134 Pounds

**Hair Color: **Brown

**Eye Color:** Brown

**Reason For Being On The Show:** it's just hard to keep a date with a guy. I tend towards the guys who need to be fixed. I can't help but think that I can make a difference, but in the end, they all turn out the same.

**Hobbies: **Swimming, relaxing bubble baths, reading, spending time with my loved ones.

**Interesting Facts: **There isn't much to say, I can burp the lyrics to Oops I Did It Again. I think that may be the only interesting thing about me.

**Tanya "Gold Digger"**

**Name:** Tanya

**Age:** 26

**Height:** 5'8"

**Weight:** N/A

**Hair Color: **Blonde

**Eye Color:** Blue

**Reason For Being On The Show:** I'm sick of running into those broke ass boys who can't support me or my hobbies

**Hobbies: **going on high end getaways, fine dining, the occasional party, and of course shopping!

**Interesting Facts: **in the past two years I haven't dated a guy who doesn't make a 6-figure paycheck

**Lauren "Party Girl"**

**Name:** Lauren

**Age:** 27

**Height:** 5' 8"

**Weight:** 137 Pounds

**Hair Color: **Blonde

**Eye Color:** Brown

**Reason For Being On The Show:** So many boys are trying to get to know me for my body, I am sick of everyone thinking I am just stupid piece of meat.

**Hobbies: **Parties, stripping, club-hopping

**Interesting Facts: **I can put my legs behind my head!

**Jessica "Desperate"**

**Name:** Jessica

**Age:** 25

**Height:** 5' 7"

**Weight:** 143 Pounds

**Hair Color: **Brown

**Eye Color:** Hazel

**Reason For Being On The Show:** Boys just don't want a second date with me, because they say that I end up calling them too many times.

**Hobbies: **ummmm dating?

**Interesting Facts: **I have a room filled with stuffed ponies and they all have special names and powers. Here is a picture of Mr. Fluffles, he can make rainbow arches that lead to pots of gold.

**Bella "Puzzle"**

**Name:** Isabella "Bella"

**Age:** 26

**Height:** 5' 6"

**Weight:** 129 Pounds on a good day

**Hair Color: **Brown

**Eye Color:** Muddy Brown

**Reason For Being On The Show:** I just haven't found mister right yet. I think it may be just because I spend all of my time working, because I am very attached to my job.

**Hobbies: **reading, music, cooking, hanging out with my friends, and work

**Interesting Facts: **I am extremely clumsy, and have a talent for tripping over flat surfaces. My medical file is three inches thick

**Ok, so that is it for this chapter, it is indeed longer than everything else I have put up (sorry for the brevity) I hope to post a much longer chapter for next time. Read and review please?**


	5. Back To The Beginning

**Chapter Five**

**Disclaimer: I do not whatsoever own any part of the Twilight franchise**

"Well Edward, they all look like very interesting girls,"

"Thanks mom."

"Although," Mused Esme, "it looks as though you have your work cut out for you. These girls are going to give you a run for your money. Just think, your work amplified into several girls instead of the usual one."

"Gee, thanks mom, I feel so much better,"

"I do what I can," Esme teased back "Just try not to go bald during taping, it would be a shame to lose that gorgeous head of hair."

Edward sighed again. He knew that his mother was right. One girl was easier than several. There was also the concern of Isabella Swan. The girls with obvious problems gave him a better idea of what he was up against. He knew the enemy, and could prepare himself better to fight it off. With girls like Bella, on the other hand, he was basically blindfolded with his hands tied behind his back. She was either having incredibly bad luck, or she had some serious issues that she would need to work out in her session of _The Truth Hurts_. No matter what the reason, he was anxious to meet her, and get the show on the road. He just prayed that she wasn't an uber bitch.

After lunch, Edward bid his mother goodbye, and walked back to his place. The show was starting in another week, and he needed to pull himself together. Refusing to take the distractions of public transportation, he had decided to take a walk to clear his mind, and remember the purpose as to why he was there. No one could have foreseen his entering into his mother's business, including himself, but fate had her own ideas of what kind of man he would become. In exchange for his heart, he would help others find their own as well as learn to share it freely.

_**Seven Years Ago**_

There was no doubt about it, Edward had led a very charmed life, and was about to continue living his all- American dreams. A very bright student, he was at the top of his class ready to take the plunge into politics. He held promise, and there wasn't a person who could deny it. There was a future for Edward Cullen, and the stars were shining upon him in approval.

Only one thing needed to be added to Edward's life, and that was a female. Someone who would love him for all of his faults and be willing to be in a relationship with him for the long haul. Edward was extremely handsome, but he preferred relationships to hook ups. Fortunately for him, he had found his hope in a girl named Stephanie. It had been a chance meeting in the local coffee shop that had marked their first encounters. Awkward glances and witty banter had left Edward's mind on an emotional high after meeting this wonderful girl.

Steph was everything a man could ever want. The perfect dream, she was intelligent, ambitious, funny, and you could take her home to mom and dad. There was nothing more that Edward could ever ask for. They had gone on numerous dates, and the chemistry between the two was increasing with each conversation. Doubt had no place in Edward's mind, he was certain he was going to marry that girl. He would find himself thinking about her in his spare time, fantasizing about where they would live, what they would be doing, and how many kids they would have. Edward's dream was within his grasp.

Six months came and went. Graduation was looming upon the school, and Edward and Steph were set to go. Each had gotten many invitations and offers to attend different grad schools, but they had both accepted schools that were miles away from each other. After many tortured sessions of tossing and turning in his bed, Edward decided to make the big leap, and tell Steph how he felt about her. The phrase "_I love you,_" was about to pass through his lips with the idea that he wanted to try and make things work between them in their time apart.

The night was perfectly planned. Some teeth had to be pulled, and assess had to be kissed, but Edward had managed to score reservations to Steph's favorite restaurant. Working overtime was something he had fit into his busy schedule so he could afford the best date of his night without any worries. Bags had started forming under his eyes, and he often had trouble staying awake in his classes, but Edward was content knowing that his work would pay off. Stephanie was in for a surprise. He had told her it was in celebration of their success and graduation, but she had no idea that he was about to profess his love to her.

The dinner was filled with cordial words, and sweaty palms, but somewhere between the main course and dessert, Edward had managed to man up and express himself to Steph.

"Sweetheart, I just want to say something,"

"Go ahead."

"Um, well, give me a second."

"Let it out,"

"Steph, I know that it has only been six months, but it has been the most mind-blowing six months of my entire life. Everything about you just amazes me, and I am finding myself unable to stop feeling a sense of awe whenever I am around you. I love you Steph, and I know that we are about to go off to different schools, but I am willing to try and work out a long distance relationship, and see where things go-"

"Stop. Just stop Edward." Steph interrupted.

Shocked, Edward just stared at her blankly. At first he had no idea how to react, but seconds later, hurt started to seep into his chest. The sensation of his heart being pulled down, caused him to grip the table, and stare at Steph with pure alarm.

"I care for you Edward, I really do. There is no doubt in my mind that you have the ability to make many girls happy, but there is no way that I am in love with you. I'm sorry. I just feel that schooling and balancing a long distance relationship is asking too much of the both of us. Please understand."

Edward just nodded his head, and before anything else could be said, the waiter set dessert down in front of the pair. Not a word was said for the rest of the date, and when it came time to leave, she simply said,

"Walk me out to my car?"

Edward silently nodded, and fell into step with her, their bodies inches apart. Too close for platonic friendship, yet not close enough for love. It seemed like a while had passed until she reached the driver's side of her car. Taking his forehead to her lips, Steph gave him one last hug and then disappeared into her car. She left him. The car drove away, and Edward was left in the parking lot, speechless.

Graduation followed soon after the breakup, and time refused to wait on Edward to collect himself. There was no regret in choosing a graduate school close to home, because he needed all of the support he could get. His summer vacation was spent moping around his house. He spent countless hours laying on his bed, or on the couch. Staring at a wall or at the moving images on his tv screen. There was no joy left for him. One day, Esme finally had reached her limit with the lump living in her house. She marched right up to him, grabbed his face, looked him in the eyes and said,

"Mark my words, Edward Cullen, you will love again. Now get off your sorry ass and be productive!"

That was the kick Edward needed to rejoin real life. He started to function with a new outlook on life, to do as wall as he could, and succeed in his studies. Looking for part-time work, and failing to land a job, Edward started to work part time as a matchmaker in his mother's company. Along the way, he quickly found he had a knack for it. Upon earning his last degree, Edward finally made the decision to turn his back on his future in politics and run towards a career in love.

His name was becoming widely known, which is what caused Crianna to come running to him for a contract deal. Much thought had come to him, and he finally decided to follow his heart, and show America what it meant to be in a meaningful relationship and foster it. His main argument? Communication. Poor communication had ended his last relationship and he would be damned to let it happen to everyone else.

A chill whispered across his body, and as he stepped inside his flat, the word communication echoed throughout his head, and hugged him all the way to sleep.

**I am working as fast as I can to catch things up! Thanks for bearing with me!**


	6. Speed Dating

**Chapter Six**

**Disclaimer: The Twilight franchise is not mine**

The day had arrived, and everything was all set. Only hours remained until the girls would show up at the house. The anxiety was building up, and as he inhaled, held his breath and then exhaled, he knew things were going to get easier soon. All he had to do was meet the girls so he would know what he was up against.

The house where the girls would be staying had a good amount of space. Not only did it have rooms, bathrooms and a kitchen for the girls to use, but it also held a large meeting room for the group to meet in as well as a hidden room for Edward's own use. The only people allowed in that room would be invited by Edward personally. Tonight, he was using it to conceal himself and a group of other men away from the girls. He was planning on getting to know them in a more non-threatening situation so he could see his true colors. Tonight, the girls were walking into a brand new situation, allowing him to fool them for a little while as he evaluated them as a man, not their coach. Esme was to pose as the matchmaker on the show for the first night, but the girls would have no idea that they were being fooled.

Glancing at the clock, Edward noticed that there was not much time left before the girls would pull up to the house. It was almost time, and he had to gather the men all together.

"Hey guys, I wanted to say something,"

"Chat away Eddie boy, we are all ears!"

Edward frown at the use of his nickname.

"Thanks for that Em. Now, as I was saying, I wanted to thank you all for coming here tonight, but I just need to go over the basics one more time. Remember, you are trying to get to know these girls, like you would on a normal date, but I need for you to take note of their personalities and mannerisms. What you liked, what you hated, anything you found weird. Later I will need for you to report back to me, so take extensive mental notes. Got it?"

Multiple replies in agreement rose up from around the room. Edward felt a slight grin come to his lips. This had the possibility to work after all.

"All right guys, it's almost time, remember, turn up the charm, and take mental notes."

"Good evening ladies, my name is Esme, and welcome to The Truth Hurts"

She paused for a moment to wait for the girls' talking to subside.

"So now, we are about to start our first activity. You are about to do some speed dating, to test your skills, so bring your best game, and let the night begin!"

The girls each rushed to a table and waited for the men to come out. Esme couldn't help but take notice of the display of facial expressions spanning across each girl's face. They ranged from nervous, to apathetic, to annoyed, even. She couldn't help but smile at the fact that she knew her son had a long road ahead of him.

"All right ladies, here they come!"

The men started to file out of the room, smiling warmly at each of the girls. Edward too note of the reactions of each ones. Some were smiling back, others cold and a few even looked, angry. That was interesting. He didn't have too much time to think before he reached his first table.

"Hello, my name is Edward,"

"My name is Tanya, nice to meet you."

Tanya was a beautiful woman, very confident. This was a positive to Edward, but at the same time, too much of it could be an issue.

"The pleasure is mine. So tell me, what do you do?"

"Oh, you know, I do a little bit here and there, I am currently an exotic dancer, maybe I can show you some moves sometime."

He spoke too soon, she was too bold. He was a bit nervous, and he struggled to find his voice as her hand traveled up his thigh.

"Um, that would be… different. So tell me, do you plan on erhm dancing forever?" He said as he nervously shifted out of her grasp.

"Definitely not! My tits will probably sag to the floor in the next 5 to 7 years. I figure I will end up with a wealthy man who can take care of me. It's all about marrying up into society. It's a man's job to take care of his wife, after all. How about you, what do you do for a living?"

"I'm a coach"

"Those don't make a lot of money do they?"

"I make enough."

Clearly disappointed in her response from Edward, Tanya quickly lost interest in who he was and the conversation remained polite, but didn't really go anywhere. When the time was up, Edward shook hands with Tanya and quickly moved on his way.

_Oh goodie, the gold digger is in full swing tonight…_

The rest of the dates kept getting more awkward as the night went on. Lauren was adamant about being known for her brain, telling Edward all about her double degrees in language and communications, but he couldn't help but notice that she was freely giving him a view of two of her other accomplishments.

Despite the awkward feelings he felt there, that was noting compared to Jessica, who deliberately placed a death grip upon his balls as a poor attempt to get him excited. Unfortunately for her, it looked like she was the only one who was going to be excited that night. He thought he was at the doctor's office. It was only a matter of minutes before he had to turn and cough. These girls were giving him a run for his money and it was only the first night.

The girls just kept coming, and the end couldn't seem to get close enough. Edward said goodbye to the last girly and quickly exited the room with the rest of the male suitors. After quickly straightening his tie and running a hand through his hair, he waited to be announced.

"Did you ladies have fun tonight?"

Mixed reactions filled the air from smiles to apathetic gazes at the ceiling.

"Now Ladies, I have something else I would like to share with you, I am not your matchmaker."

The girls immediately directed their attention to the woman in front of them. They reacted predictably in a surprised manner. Esme continued,

"Don't worry though, you will be seeing me later at various times throughout your stay here. I do, however, want to introduce you to the person who you will get to know throughout the next few weeks. I'd like to introduce you to my son, Edward!"

Cued by his mother's announcement, Edward straightened his posture and walked back out into the room of girls. He grinned and put out his best gesture of kindness. Staring around the room, he noticed some girls looked happy, others embarrassed, and a few slightly angry. Doing his best to ignore the reactions, he addressed them.

"Ladies, welcome, as you know, my name is Edward, and I am going to be leading you through the next few weeks. I apologize for not introducing myself sooner, but I wanted to see who you were, before you knew who I was. With that, I hope to have a very good connection with you so that I can find you love. Now, you may take your things, get unpacked, and find yourself a room, I will see you in the meeting room in a little while-"

The sound of a fist pounding the table came to everyone's attention as they all turned to look at the cause of such commotion. In the corner, Bella had a pissed expression on her face, as if she were ready to cause serious damage. Alice had gotten up to give her a hug and guide her up the stairs, looking back in Edward's direction with a sympathetic gaze. Yes, this would be an interesting experience.


	7. Headstrong or Maneater?

**Chapter 7**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight…AT ALL**

**Alright, I have decided to update ONE more time before I have to leave on my trip, but after this I don't know when you will hear from me again.**

"All right gentlemen, what do you have for me?"

While the girls were settling in to their new home, Edward had brought all of the men together to get their point of view on the situation. He was pleasantly surprised by the feedback he got.

"Well dude, let me just say, that Rosalie is HOT, I would LOVE to get set up on a date with her."

Edward smiled. He knew that Emmet and Rosalie had some potential to be together.

**Earlier That Night**

Approaching Rosalie's table, Edward could tell that she had a strong attitude. Despite that, she looked a little bit approachable. He knew that he had labeled her the ball buster, but couldn't seem to remember why. Nevertheless, he would approach her with caution. Before even sitting down, he shook her hand and introduced himself.

"Hello, my name is Edward."

"Rosalie"

"Nice to meet you"

"Enough with the chit chat here Edward, let's get to this. You aren't really my type, sorry to tell you."

Interesting. Edward raised an eyebrow and inquired,

"Why not? You haven't gotten to know me yet."

"Trust me, I know all I need to just by looking at you."

"Enlighten me."

He was challenging her. Judging by the tight expression on her face, Rosalie had gotten the message. Ready for a battle she let him in on her thinking process.

"For starters, let's go with your appearance, yes, you are very attractive, but not what I am really looking for. You have the height, but none of the bulk. Don't get offended, I know you probably fight very hard for what little muscle you have, but you have to be built like a linebacker sweetie before you can even consider dating me. And that handshake! Appalling! I have an eighty-five year old grandfather that has a firmer grip than you. Shaking your hand was like waving a wet noodle in the air!"

Rosalie's rant was long enough to fill up the short amount of time that each date took. Edward noticed that she smirked when he almost ran away from her table. _Now I remember why I called her the ball buster_. Her thought

Shuddering at the thought, Edward clamped his hand on Emmet's broad shoulder

"You know, I think that may be arranged."

"I swear, man, that girl was scary. It was all I could do from running out of the room. Poor Steve here started to cry, and she just smacked him in the head and told him to suck it up." Another guy piped up.

Edward looked around the room at all of the other guys nodding in agreement, while Steve looked like he had another wave of tears coming on. _Ok, mental note, find a guy with nice build and good attitude to balance out her guarded one. Emmet should do fine for now, I just hope she likes him._

"Ok, so we agree that Rosalie is… difficult to approach, now, let's move on to… let's see, Angela."

There was a silence around the room. A few minutes passed, and all of the guys looked like they were thinking really hard. This was not good.

"Is that the one who was grabbing everyone's balls?"

"No dude, that was Jessica."

"Maybe it was that gold digger," Another suggested.

"Nope, that was Tanya,"

Steve, who had composed himself remarkably spoke up,

"I guess we can all agree that she just wasn't memorable at all."

Silence.

Edward ignored it, nodded and tried to move the topic onto a new girl, before the guys got bored. They kept discussing and deciding the flaws in each girl, keeping it cool and professional until they landed on one particular candidate.

"Alice, now what did we think about her?"

"Way too hyper," A guy named Chris exclaimed. "It's like watching a super ball, that shit was insane!"

The guys all started talking at once, describing their experience with the small caffeinated girl.

**Earlier That Night**

Before he even started towards Alice's direction, Edward noticed a lot of the guys leaving looked quite burnt out after a few short minutes. Taking a deep breath, and held his hand out to shake.

"Hello, my name is Edward, how are you doing?"

The short girl took his hand with much enthusiasm and started waving it wildly about.

"Hi Edward! My name is Alice! How are you doing? What do you do for a living? Have any hobbies? How about pets? I like animals! Except for cats, they shed all over m clothes and-"

As Alice paused to inhale, Edward took it as his cue to cut in and take over the conversation.

"Well Alice, that was a lot you gave me to answer, but let me see if I can answer all of your questions, I am a coach, I like to read, and no I have no animals, but I agree that cats shed a lot. What do you do?"

"I'm a student, for fashion design! It's perfect because it goes great with my hobby of shopping. Hopefully I will get to do some while I am here, I can't last a week without buying something,"

Edward's forehead gently creased with concern. He would have to let the channel executives allow some time for Alice to shop a little so she wouldn't go insane. Just as she was about to go into the important difference between sandals and flip-flops, time was up, and the next poor sucker was left to be stuck with Alice and her shopping addiction.

"OK, so now we have almost all of the girls, except for one, Bella."

All of the guys got excited once again, but none of them had the same reaction.

"She was hot!"

"So nice."

"What a nerd!"

"Ice queen"

"Ice queen? How about frigid or Cold hard bitch?"

The guys all stopped to look at each other.

"Did we meet the same girl?"

_Oh boy_, thought Edward, _this is going to be the real challenge_.

**Earlier That Night**

_This is it_, thought Edward_, the last girl I have to meet tonight_. I hope she isn't crazy. Unfortunately for him, she wasn't crazy, she was worse.

"Hello, I'm Edward, what is your name?"

"Bella,"

Immediately Edward noticed she was beautiful, but a bit shy. He thought it was adorable. This girl was the most beautiful woman he had seen in the room, perhaps one of the prettiest women he had seen in a long time. Looks weren't everything though, so he decided to test her intellect. He quickly found that she was quite bright, adding to the initial attraction. There was one thing, however, that he had to know. When they had slightly gotten to know each other, he asked the question.

"So Bella, what brings you to the show?"

"Oh, you know, trying to find love… or sanity" She mumbled the last part under her breath. Edward chose to ignore that part, so he wouldn't cause a conflict.

"On a tv show, that seems pretty odd,"

"What are you trying to say?"

_Uh oh,_ thought Edward, _I am digging a hole here, better try and fix this situation before it turns into my grave_.

"Nothing, this is just an unconventional way to meet people, you know having it broadcasted all over tv. And in all honesty, you seem a bit too intellectual to want to be here."

"Well it isn't your place to say now is it? I think it is best if you just left now."

"Fair enough. good-bye Bella,"

"Good-bye and good-riddance, asshole," she muttered.

Edward just kept walking, pretending he had never heard her comment. So much for ending the date on a good note.

"Thanks you guys, I couldn't have done this without you, some of you may be getting phone calls from me later to set up some dates with some of the girls."

The guys slowly stood and filed out the door, waving good-bye to each other. Emmet made sure to give Edward one big hug, before shuffling out to the apartment he, Edward and Jasper shared.

"See you at home, right dude?"

"Of course Emmet, within the next few hours, I just need to finish up here, we get to do the next fun part, review."

"All right, don't tire yourself out so soon Eddie boy, you have weeks more of this to come."

"Gee thanks Em, now get your ass out of here and I will see you later."

As soon as Emmet left, Edward collapsed onto the couch behind him. Leaning back in his seat, he took a look at all the profiles once again, gingerly picking Bella's file up to examine before he left. She looked as if she was going to jump over the table and stab him with her pen when he revealed his true self. Edward was not looking forward to facing her at review.

"Looks like I have a lot of fixing to do, God help me," he thought aloud.

**There is chapter 7, not too many changes. **

**My apologies to READREADREAD I did keep some of the interviews you thought had been thrown away. Please don't hold it against me! **


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